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59. Fearing Judgement from Others

Let me ask you a question that I wish someone would have asked me somewhere around 2005 when I was first dipping my toe into the waters of entrepreneurship and starting to sell real estate (as an infant at age 22, basically):

How much time do you spend trying to micromanage relationships in your life and perceptions of others around you so they don’t judge you or misunderstand you?

Would you lose sleep at night if someone had a misconception about you or your business and you didn’t “fix it”?

Do you pull back from doing or saying the bold thing you really want to do or say because of a fear of Judgement from people in your life?

For SO MANY health and wellness business owners, the answer to these questions is YES. They do. And you might be holding yourself back for the same reasons, which I’m going to teach you how to overcome with one helpful tactic in this episode.

Transcript

0:00
Welcome to the show today, my app our brand, we are going to be talking about how the fear of judgment shows up for entrepreneurs, which you are, of course, if you’re listening to this show, even if sometimes maybe you don’t consider yourself as such, I would challenge you that yes, you are an entrepreneur.

0:17
So the fear of judgment is likely a sneaky saboteur, for you in your business in some capacity. And here’s why. The judgments of others are our secret judgments of ourselves, and we project them on to other people.

0:32
And let me tell you, we all love to judge ourselves. We are our harshest critics, we have a lot of judgments about ourselves, typically. So stick with me. And I’m going to give you a full proof trick for dealing with this judgment, both for yourself and the fear of judgment of others. And if you are listening to this in real time, in November 2022, you are in for a real treat. Because at the end of this episode, I am going to invite you to attend a brand new free live class that I am teaching on December 1, and it’s all about making more money in your business. Without social media, which seems maybe like a weird segue from the discussion around judgment. Well, actually, it’s the perfect lead in because everything I’m going to teach on that class is going to help you to create the exact business model that you want, the exact marketing channels you want, and the exact level of visibility that you want in your business without exposing yourself to the endless pit of negativity on social media, if you so choose. So I’m good. And even if you love social media, and it’s working to bring in money for your business, you’re going to get a ton of value from the live class. So hang in till the end for that registration link. Now, let me ask you a question that I wish someone would have asked me somewhere around 2005 When I was first dipping my toe into the waters of entrepreneurship, because back in those days, I was starting to sell real estate as an infant. Basically, I was a toddler selling real estate.

1:53
Okay, fine. I was 22. But as I look back, I may as well have been in diapers totaling around to trying to sell people houses. Here’s what I wish someone would have asked me. Are you willing to let people be wrong about you? And really think about this? Are you? I wish someone had asked me what I but for now, are you? And how much time do you spend trying to micromanage relationships in your life and perceptions of others around you? So that they don’t judge you? Or misunderstand you?

2:20
Like really think about that? Will you lose sleep at night, if someone had a misconception about you or your business, and you didn’t fix it somehow? I put fix it in quotation marks here. You can’t see me doing that. But I’m like, if you if you didn’t fix it as if that’s possible, would you lose sleep, sleep at night over that feeling that someone is wrong about you? Or they’re judging you or your business? And do you pull back from doing or saying the bold thing that you really want to do? Or you really want to say, because of that fear of judgment from other people in your life? Now, for so many health and wellness business owners, and for me definitely at multiple times in my business journey? The answer has been Yes, they do. I do I have and you might too. So let’s talk about it. Now, as a business owner, that’s making money and truly helping people, you have to be willing to repel people that aren’t the right fit for you, or for your values and your philosophies, or for your particular offer. Now, here’s a saying that I’ve probably said before, because I say this a lot, but I think it is perfect. It’s the perfect little, little catchy thing to give you in terms of repelling people. And I don’t know who to give this credit to. I wish I knew where I had first heard this, I don’t know, I’m sure it’s a widely practicing. So I don’t even know who to give credit to. But here you go, love me or hate me, there’s no money in the middle. Think about that for a second love me or hate me, there’s no money in the middle. So people that love you are going to hire you, they’re going to pay you and they’re going to transform their lives. People that hate you, or judge you or don’t resonate, that you’re repelling, are never gonna buy from you anyway, they’re never going to listen to what you have to say anyway. And that’s fine. One or the other. But in the middle, there’s actually no money there. Either. There’s no results for you or for them in the middle. So a lot of times we innately want to be in the middle, especially as business owners, we don’t want to offend people, we don’t want to leave any money on the tables, we try to appeal to everyone. We try to mitigate every single perception that anyone could ever have about how we work or what our values are, or why we’re different than a different solution they might have and we live in this middle and marketing wise, delivery wise with our clients, we live in the middle, and there’s no money there. So get out of the middle.

4:34
I understand why we do this as business owners, we want to feel safe and we want to feel neutral. And we want to feel like we are helping everyone and not offensive. But accommodating everyone’s opinions but our own is going to always keep us in that stuck place in the middle where there’s just really no money. So we default to biting our tongues instead of leaning into the debates and hashing it out and really taking a stand on what we believe in really fleshing out what

5:00
those opinions are and our personal philosophies, our business philosophies, our values, who we do help, who we don’t help, who’s a good fit, who’s a bad fit, you know that you kind of wanted to get to the point where you’re out of the middle.

5:14
As I say this, aren’t you kind of seeing how you might be in the middle a little bit, and there’s no money there. So love me or hate me, there’s no money in the middle. And I’m going to offer that there really is no middle either. It’s made up in your mind. But if there was a middle, the same still applies love me or hate me, there’s no money in the middle. One of my students in my mastermind, has kind of amended this, which I love so much, she has loved me or hate me, there’s no results in the middle, meaning no results for her and no results for her clients. But this goes against human nature and the instincts to remain part of the tribe that most of us have very innately ingrained in our subconscious mind that we want to be part of the herd, we want to stay in the middle and we don’t want to get to the fringe. We don’t want to get to the outside, we don’t want to alienate ourselves or others, we want to stay in the middle. This default fear of repelling a portion of your people or the tribe so that you can be an irresistible magnet to others, and help them really transform their lives. By the way, it’s a real fear, you may know conceptually, that that would be a great idea. And that getting to the polar ends of the spectrum and getting out of the middle, where people either love you or hate you. And it’s one or the other, and there’s no grades, it’s just they love me or they hate me. And it’s totally okay if they hate me, because they’ll go find someone else to help them. Really, that’s what’s happening here, I just want to do a little aside, when you are willing to repel people who are not the right fit for you or for your business or for your offer, you are setting them free, so that they can find someone that can help them being in the middle. And kind of sort of being vague and ambiguous about who you help, what you stand for, who’s the best fit for you, really keeps those people stuck. Because you have potential clients who are in the middle as well, they’re not getting the results, they’re still wondering if maybe Is this for me, I’m not really sure. And they’re not out finding someone that really can help them. So truly think about repelling people is sending them on their way. So they go find their person that is going to help them and the people that love you and that are completely magnetized to your mission, your values, your philosophies, your boldness, whatever that is, are going to love working with you, they are going to enjoy spending money with you so much, they are going to get the best results because they are the best fit for you and for your offer. So fearing that judgment of others, it’s a real thing. It’s very subconscious. It’s very ancestral and habitual and we don’t want to be on the fringe of the tribe, we want to be safely in the middle. But as a business owner, we have to be willing to pick the polarity, I think that’s how I want to say that we want we have to be polarizing, we have to be either love me or hate me, there’s no money in the middle, we have to get out of the middle. And that means that we are going to be opening up ourselves as business owners, to the judgment of others. All right, but here’s the thing. Remember, the thing about fearing judgment of others, is really we are fearing judgment of something that we’re already judging ourselves for. So think about that. Anything you’re afraid of someone else judging you for is something that you’re already secretly judging yourself for. Because our brains are so fun, and they’re so predictable.

8:16
And our clients and the people in our life will mirror our greatest fears back to us in case we weren’t aware that we had them. That’s what’s happening here. Now, some examples of judgments of others that are really judgments of ourselves, of course, that have come up for me and I’ve come up with my clients and we’ve coached on this are as follows. Here’s here’s one example. There are a lot of these, but I picked some of my the biggest ones that come up over and over again, because I know that these are going to be really helpful for you to see. So one example of judgment of others, or fearing the judgment of others, rather, is a client of mine that I was coaching on her anxiety about having to get another job. And she was like, Ah, I quit my job. And my nutrition practice is bringing in money and it’s working, but it’s not going as fast as I want it to and the more that I stress about it, the more I’m sabotaging it. And she was kind of in a cycle about thinking maybe I have to get another job. And she was really, really anxious about the judgment of her past coworkers. Seeing her go having to get another job and having this in quotes have to get another job. So her anxiety was around the judgment of those people in her life that she had probably proclaimed she was going off on her own and she was starting her own business. And what were people going to think of her if they saw that she was not as successful as she had wanted to be and was getting another job. So our coaching around this was, first of all, I asked her Do you have to get another job? Have we run the numbers? Do we know what has to happen here so that I would give for anyone in a similar situation? Because our brains tend to catastrophize every situation and we tend to listen to our brains, we tend to listen to our thoughts and believe them to be true. So I would question everything first of all, do you have to get another job

10:00
Do you have to? Or do you want to? And will you? These are all questions open for discussion in your mind and with people in your life. So I’ll just throw that out there. These are all things we should be considering. Is it true that you have to that you will? Or that other people will even have thoughts about it? Will people even know? Will they even have thoughts about it? Will they even be aware of the situation? Let’s question that too. And then let’s look at the other side of any judgment that we’re actually worried about. Because truly what’s happening here with my client, when she is trying to protect herself from the judgment of other people in her life around this, this decision means that she was judging herself for this decision, was this the wrong decision to lose my job? Is this not going? You know, am I letting myself down? Because this is not going fast enough? What do I think about that that’s a judgment she’s having internally. And then of course, she’s afraid of other people seeing that and judging her for the same thing. So I brought her through a little thought exercise, which I think is super valuable for all of us. And I do this myself quite often, where I make myself go to the other side of the coin, and I make myself look at the other side of it. So if I’m ever worried about a judgment coming from someone else, I can acknowledge it, that might happen. First of all, it might happen, other people may judge me for this thing. And that’s none of my business, because I can’t actually micromanage the thoughts of other people. As much as I would like to. And as much as I sometimes think that I can raise your hand, if you’re a parent, you know that that actually isn’t possible. So I remind myself that that isn’t actually possible, and people are going to have thoughts about me, and it’s none of my business. But then I question if the thoughts and the judgments that I’m worried about are actually the thoughts and judgments are going to have. So I make myself go to the other side of the coin. And I did this with my client as well. I said, Is it possible that if you decided you did need to get another job, and you did that? Which is up for debate, do you need to are you going to it’s up for debate, but let’s go to that scenario, let’s go to the worst case scenario in your mind. And for her it was, I have to get another job, and everyone in my life is going to know it and my past coworkers are going to know it. So we went to all of that. Okay, assume all that’s true, it probably wouldn’t ever actually be true. But if it was, will they judge that and judge you as a failure? Or other side of the coin? Well, they admire your tenacity, and wish that they were also willing to, to pursue their dreams, to do something uncomfortable, to put their finances on the line and go for it and to pursue their dreams. Is that possible? We decided it is absolutely possible that the judgments that we fear are actually not even the thoughts that people would be having, what if they were admiring your tenacity, and they were wishing that they were pursuing their own dreams. And actually, then they were judging themselves that they weren’t taking the big chance like you are.

12:49
It’s crazy, right? Because when you go to the other side of the coin, and you take yourself to the 180 degree, different judgmental opinion or thoughts, you can see how that would also be true. And really, ultimately, at the end of all of this, I’ll every example I’m going to give at the end of it, you’re going to just realize that we can just let people be wrong about us. And that’s where my client came to with during this coaching session, she realized she had a plan, she was capable, she did have other ways to earn income, she was also probably not at the stage really financially, where she needed to be doing that she was just having some anxiety, and she was willing to let people be wrong about her. And that was okay. Right. So I give that to you as well. Now, here’s another example of how judgment of others are really judgments of ourselves, our brains, there’s so fun.

13:37
Kind of piggybacking on that last example, what about when business isn’t growing as fast as you anticipated? First of all, again, are going to question everything. Who made the timeline? What was the timeline based on? And isn’t it growing fast enough? Like how are we measuring the growth? Is it possible that things actually are working? But you’re not seeing it? Because you’re so hyper focused on just one aspect of the business? If you just hyper focus on one metric that you’re tracking? Is it possible that you’re not seeing how things actually are growing as fast as you anticipate it? So I always will coach my clients on this, like, let’s talk about it. Is this even true? Because something like my business isn’t growing as fast as I need it to? Or as fast as I thought it would? There’s a lot of what’s the word I want to say? There’s a lot of we’re taking a lot of leaps there. Okay, so let’s question all of it. Who decided the timeline?

14:31
Is it actually not working? Are there places where it is working? Let’s get really granular here. And then let’s go to the worst case scenario. Okay. So if the fear here is that people are going to judge my business because it isn’t and judge me ultimately, because my business isn’t growing as fast as I thought it would or as fast as I wanted it to or as fast as I said it would, those people are going to have opinions about it, or they’re gonna have opinions about me. Okay, that’s the fear here the fear of judgment. So ultimately, what’s happening is if this is coming up for you

15:00
AND, and OR has come up for my clients when we’ve coached on this, the real judgment is that you’re having a judgment on yourself that it isn’t going as fast as you anticipated, okay? Because otherwise, if you weren’t already judging yourself for this, you would it would never be even in your awareness that other people might be thinking these thoughts, it wouldn’t even be in your mind at all. And I coach my clients on this on a version of this a lot inside my program and inside the mastermind, because for most of us high achievers and entrepreneurs, we think that we’re behind, like we, we just have a default pattern for a lot of us high achieving used to getting our goals going after it taking a lot of action. For most of us, we feel like we’re behind, like we’re always behind, there’s more we can do or hustlers at heart for a lot of us. And that thought pattern leads us to believe that other people are having that same judgment about us being behind. Like we’re not there yet. We’re not doing it fast enough. Oh, it’s exhausting. asked me how I know this card carrying member of the high achievers thinking you’re behind club. So I have done a lot of coaching on this. And I’ve done a lot of work. And I will tell you that what I have realized what I coach my clients on and what I would offer to you if you fear this judgment of people are judging yourself or your business. But the same thing is that right now you are where you used to want to get to, I want you to think about this. Right? Like you think when you get there, things are going to be better. And that’s why we think that we’re behind, we’re like, I’m not there yet, whatever there is. But right now is the there that you used to want to get to, at some point in your journey. Because at one point in your life, you were just a regular person, you were just living in the regular world, before you decided to do your business. And before you are completely surrounded by ambition and thoughts of what is possible. If you have your own business, and you help people with their health, and you follow your heart and your intuition into whatever this dream business is of yours before that happened when you were a regular person before.

17:05
Here is where you want it to get to. There is a point when right now was the there that you used to think was going to solve all your problems. Same for me. And so are you willing to let yourself be wrong about what the timeline is to get to the next there, or for how you’re going to enjoy it when you get to the next step. Because right now, you’re judging yourself that you’re not enjoying the there that you’re at right now, I feel like this is a little meta, but stay with me.

17:33
Wherever you are right now is somewhere you want it to be enjoy it, own it, don’t judge it and realize that however long it takes to get to the next there, whatever the next milestone is for you, whatever the goal is that you’re working towards, is just the right amount of time. You don’t need to judge it, you don’t need to try to micromanage the timeline of it. It’s just, it’s just the journey, we’re enjoying the journey. Same for me something I remind myself of a lot, because it turns out that there isn’t actually better than here. There’s just different problems there.

18:04
And as a business owner, usually there is where you have more money to solve some of those problems, which is also great, but then different problems come up. So there really is no better there really is no there where suddenly you have all of the time and all of the freedom and all of the happy thoughts and never any anxiety or never any judgments of yourself or others Nope, doesn’t happen because you’re human with a human brain. So same thing for me. I coach myself on this all of the time. The only reason that we fear the judgment of other people about how fast or how slow our business is growing is because we’re judging ourselves for that. So start internally start questioning, why am I judging myself for this? Why did I pick this arbitrary timeline? And then I’m holding myself hostage with it? Am I using my goals to motivate me and to give me a Northstar to go towards? Or am I using these goals as a reason to beat myself up? Okay, think about it. Think about your judgment of yourself and realize that when you stop judging yourself for this, you will never fear other people of judging you about how fast or how slow your business is growing. Because if you don’t judge yourself for it, you’re totally willing to let other people be wrong about you as well. And if they have a thought that it’s growing too slowly, you’ll let them be wrong about that. And it won’t bother you. It’ll be like water off your back, or other side of the coin flip side 180 degrees on the other side of the spectrum, is that maybe people are judging how fast you’re going. Maybe that’s blowing their mind how quickly you’re you’re growing your business and you’re having results and they’re actually judging themselves themselves that they’re not doing the same thing. Just saying it’s possibility right? We never know what people are thinking we can never actually hyper manage control

19:42
other people’s thoughts. It’s a sad reality as someone that’s married to sad to know that we can’t actually do that.

19:51
I know I’m so sorry to just keep it real today and tell all of us remind all of us that we can’t actually do that. Here’s another way

20:00
That judgments of others that I can coach my clients on and have seen in myself, are actually judgments of ourselves and how they come up. Here’s another example, when people are afraid of other people in their life, thinking that they’re promoting their business too much. And when I’m coaching my clients on this, it’s usually a version of, I don’t want to send too many emails, I want to email every two weeks. And I want to make an offer once a month, or I want to send an email every week, but I only want to make an offer every two weeks. And I want it to in there’s like very specific,

20:32
very specific parameters around how often you can be promoting your business versus giving value and just helping people for free, which is an entirely different topic that I will be doing many, many more podcasts on. But let’s say focus, the the question here is, how can I market my business without people thinking I’m promoting it too much? That’s the coaching question that typically comes up. So my coaching around this to my clients, and what I’ll give to you if this is something that you think about is what is too much? Who gets to decide what too much is? And what we’ll probably want to say this? Like, what is the Goldilocks perfect amount? What is too much? What is too little? And then what can you quantify what just right is in the middle? Figure out what that is? And then if I was coaching you on this live, I would ask you, are there people that think that that Goldilocks amount of years, whatever that is, are there people that think that that’s too much? And other people that think that that’s not enough? And your answer to that will of course be yes, they’re going to be people who think both of those things. And so really, there is no Goldilocks amount for anyone, there’s no perfect amount of promotion, or perfect amount of talking about your business, or perfect amount of telling people this is how you work with me. And perfect amount of selling, there’s no perfect about there isn’t, you just get to decide what is perfect for you and for your business. And for your very, very, very best clients. What do they need to hear? How often do they need to hear it? And how are you serving them, because remember, love me or hate me, there’s no money in the middle. And in the middle is where we’re trying to never have anyone judge us ever. But really, to have a successful business and to really help your clients, your best people, the ones that are laying in bed at night, wishing that they had the solution that you have those people, those ones that want to throw their credit card, are you

22:19
helping them means that you have to get out of the middle and risk the judgment of anyone, and you have to just be willing to let anyone and everyone be wrong about you. And that’s okay. So, I would ask you, if you think that you’re promoting your business too much, or if you think that that’s a judgment that people are having about you get really specific, what would be too little? What would be just right. Are there people are your best people? Are they thinking that that’s too little or just right? What about your best people? Let’s think about them? What if they have opinions that you’re not promoting your business enough? Which is there are people that are paying attention? And they are thinking, Why Why doesn’t she promote more? What’s going on here, and they’re actually having judgments 180 degrees different than the one that you’re judging yourself for. Because basically, if you’re afraid of other people thinking that you’re too promotional, or you too salesy, you’re judging yourself for those things. And you’re fearing that other people are doing the same. But if you think about the people that are needing your help, and that you’re offering them the solution that they want, that they’re laying in bed at night wishing they had, and you’re saying the words, I can help you, I can help you, I can help you. If that’s promoting your business saying I can help you is that a problem? And why would other people judge you for that? The answer, my friend is only because they wish that they were doing the same thing. The only reason that someone would judge you for that is because secretly they’re judging themselves, that they’re not willing to take that risk, and they’re not willing to have their own business. And they’re not willing to say the words I can help you. So really think about that. Another judgment that comes up for some of my clients. And when I say some, I mean, a lot of my clients, I think pretty much everybody at some point in their business journey has thoughts like this, people are going to think I’m charging too much. Or another version of this that I’ve coached many people in my programs on, is people are going to see me marketing my business, and they’re going to think Who are they to be charging that much. So this is a really interesting one, because I find that my clients tend to and I if I’m being honest, I’ve had the same thoughts, especially early in my holistic nutrition practice. I had the thought I know my clients have the thought, Oh, I just want to get strangers on the internet to work with me. Because then people in my life in my personal life are not going to have judgments about how much I’m charging. So interesting, isn’t it? Because really the only reason you me anyone would be wondering that is because we are questioning who am I to be charging this much. So I want to say this again. The the coaching and the secret fear about the judgement is people are going to judge who am I to be charging that much. That’s what they’re going to be thinking people in my life are going to wonder Who am I to be charging that much all

25:00
Only because you’re secretly wondering yourself, who am I to be charging that much? So the coaching around this and how I’ve coached clients on this is let’s talk about it, who aren’t you gonna be charging this much? Let’s answer the question. Anytime your brain really like lingers on and loops on a question, just answer the question, Who are you to be charging that much. And this is an exercise I do with my clients. So we talk about who are you to do that, we’re talking about your self concept, as a practitioner, your self concept, as a business owner, you’re just how you show up in the world as a human being your personality traits, your values, who are you to be charging that much. And then we get to your experience, your training, your experience in your life, your lived experience, how you earned the expertise that you now have, because there’s two ways to do that you can learn it, or you can earn it. For many of us in health and wellness, we’ve done both. So who are you to be charging that much? And are you willing for people in your life to be wrong about you?

26:01
Or subtext? Are you willing to tell them who you are to be charging that much?

26:08
Because I find that the coaching around this really is? Do Are you willing to tell people how you are charging this much? And who you are that you are doing that? And are you willing to tell people in your life? How much of an expert you are, and the results that you can help people get? And are you willing to talk about yourself in that way to the people around you? Or are you willing to see people around you talk about yourself that way? To your clients? Love your hate me no money in the middle? Who are you to be charging that much such a good question. And really, when you answer that, and when you answer any of these questions, when you dig into the fear of judgment from others, however, that shows up for you, whatever you’re fearing, people are going to think that the almighty people, those people, what are they going to think of me? What are they going to think of my business? What are they going to think of my failures? What is that going to look like to them? What’s the worst thing that will happen when these come up? Because they will, there will be judgments from people, they’re happening right now. Either they’re judging you for going too fast or too slow. They’re judging you for talking too much or too little. They’re judging you for charging too much or too little. Just just happening. This is what we do. As humans, we judge ourselves, we judge others. It’s just the way of the world. So it’ll happen. Are you willing for people to be wrong about you? And if so, what is the worst thing that’s going to happen? When you get judged? You’re to feel an emotion. At the end of the day, this is the worst thing that’s going to happen. You are going to feel an emotion in your body. Rejected, embarrassed, exposed, misunderstood, judged.

27:38
All emotions in your body. And can you just feel those feelings and let it be part of the process? Not try to avoid it, not try to fix it, not try to change it. Not try to make people not judge you so that you don’t have to feel judged? Can you just feel judged? Can you just feel exposed? Can you just feel misunderstood.

27:58
And just let it be part of the process. Nothing has gone wrong. Because my friend it will happen. People will have thoughts and judgments about you. You may not like those thoughts and judgments. Many of them you’ll never even know about because they’re happening now anyway, not only are you judging yourself, but people are also having thoughts about you. Like I said that you’re not helping enough that you’re playing small, that you’re not living up to your potential that you aren’t charging enough. They’re having the same judgments about themselves, human nature is happening to you, it’s happening to them, probably not going to stop at anytime soon. So the solution isn’t to try to mitigate the circumstances. So no one will ever have a judgmental thought about you. And that your ego will never get bruised. And you’ll never hear about someone else’s judgments. No, that’s not even possible. And to be honest, people aren’t going to reflect your greatest fears back to you. And this has happened to me so many times in my business.

28:52
What I secretly am judging myself for something or I’m worried that other people are judging me for something, and I will get an email that verbatim says from a stranger on the internet, the exact thing I’m scared of, and I’m like, oh, there it is. Okay, I knew that was coming. You gotta clean up that thought and just be okay with people, with people being wrong about me. And you can just let people be wrong about you, too. So the solution here is just to feel those feelings, anticipate them know that they’re going to come up and you can survive having these vibrations in your body. They’re going to happen sometimes exposed, judged, misunderstood, rejected, all of those things, it’s going to happen and you can just feel them. And if that’s the worst thing that happens in pursuit of your dreams, you’re going to be okay, because you can just let people be wrong about you. It’s not your job to make sure everyone understands your truest nature, and your deepest thoughts and your deepest motivations and your altruistic everything. It’s not your business. They can just be wrong about you permission granted, you can just let people be wrong about you. Now, let me tell you when I permanently deleted all my social media profiles, which means business and personal and I

30:00
It took a stand in my life publicly and personally and to anyone that wanted to ask me about it against censorship and with my convictions about the unhealthy nature of our reliance on big tech and social media in general, I was willing to let people be wrong about me, and judge me and my values and just think I was a cook. Like, honestly, that was what it took, I just had to say what was true for me, and know that people could think whatever they wanted to think and judge it, and they could just be wrong about me. And I had to be willing to feel some feelings. Let me tell you, I felt a lot of feelings about that. I still do sometimes. But it’s worth it. Because on the other side of that willingness to be judged, and to judge myself, as a business that I love, I freaking love it. And my life that I love, I work very part time, I spend zero hours each week scrolling, ever, or posting, or comparing myself to anyone else that I see online, or even worrying about what other people are doing online. So I get to deeply help people every single day, I have much more bandwidth in my life to do that, and much more present with my family and with the things that are important to me. Just truly, because I don’t have the brain space about what other people are doing and saying, and you know what else I found the people in my life that support me, will support me no matter what, whether they feel the same way I do, or they care about the same things I do or not, they will support me, in anyone’s judgment that I was nervous about isn’t paying attention to me anyway. So I’ll offer that to you as well. This is what I have found to be true. It’s probably true for you, too. The judgment that you’re really worried about, those people probably aren’t even paying attention, they’re never even going to know. So join me on December 1. I know I teed this up at the beginning of the episode, but I want to circle back, join me on December 1 for a brand new live class that I’m teaching all about making money in your holistic nutrition or health coaching business without social media, if that’s a goal for you to or for bomb proofing your business against relying too much on social media for one, and if you no longer have that platform, we’re gonna be talking all about it in the class. Again, it is brand new, everything I’m teaching there is brand spanking new register for this class coming up on December 1, can you tell them excited about it,

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build a profitable practice.com/learn l e, AR n all lowercase to save your seat again, register at Build a Profitable practice.com/learn. And in the class, we’re gonna be talking all about the misconceptions that practitioners have about how to get clients and why growing their audience actually slows down their business growth a lot of the time. And at what stage you do need to prioritize growing your audience is a whole discussion that we’re going to be having, as always, I’m an open book. So you can ask any questions that you have during the live q&a. And we’re going to just get to work because 2023 is right around the corner, as you know, and you’re not going to judge yourself.

32:48
You’re not going to judge yourself for the 2022 year that you had to date, or how quickly how slowly your business is growing. None of it. You’re gonna stop judging yourself and worrying about other people judging it. And I’m gonna help you do that. So don’t worry, I won’t judge you or your questions on our class on December 1, and I’m willing to let you be wrong about me too. So let’s do it together. Have a wonderful, wonderful week my friend

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I'm Andrea Nordling

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I help Holistic Nutritionists and Health Coaches get more clients in the door, more profit in their pockets, and more freedom in their life without relying on social media.

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