124. 3 Fixes For Success Entitlement To Use With Your Clients

Andrea Nordling 00:00
Woohoo Hello there my High Achiever perfectionist gotta get there faster at all costs friend.
How do I know? Because I am right there with you. You’re in for a treat today, it is going to be
one part Humble Pie and two parts. Let’s freakin go. Deal. All right. Specifically, I am going to
tell you about how I have experienced success entitlement over the last year in particular, how
I see it show up with my clients as well. And three tried and true strategies for overcoming a lull
in your business growth, or for crawling out of a hole when you’re not getting the results that
you want. So you can get back on track and confidently help your clients when the same thing
inevitably happens to them. Are you ready? Like I said, this is going to be delivered with a little
bit of a humility check for you along with an action plan. Because why have a humility check if
we don’t have a plan to turn it around. Before we get into all of this. And I do have a lot to say
on this topic. today. I want to take a second to mention two important things. One, if you’re
listening to this in February of 2024, when it’s being released, you absolutely must register for
the upcoming clients week, five day free training. The truth is you do not have a business if you
don’t have paying clients period, which is why I’m hosting a very special five day free training
starting on Monday, February 26, called clients week, clients week is free for you to access for
all five days, although you will actually be getting access to paid content from inside the
profitable nutritionist program. And this is content where I teach you exactly what to say. And
perhaps even more importantly, what not to say, to get the right clients. I’ve released this
training for free for a limited time before and the feedback has been amazing. Every single
time, I get so many emails and so many comments afterwards. In fact, somebody recently told
me after one of the last times I released it, that she took the clients we training, she did the
training did the free content. And then she used it to launch her business and have her first
$10,000 month boom, not to mention, you get a peek behind the scenes of what the content is
like in the profitable nutrition program. So if you’re not already in there, you get a sneak peek.
And of course, you’re going to want to join us when the doors open on February 29 For the next
enrollment. So to get set up for clients week to join us in that five day free training, which I’m
really excited, I have some new stuff that I have prepared for this round of the training, you go
to the profitable nutritionist.com/clients plural. Again, that’s the profitable
nutritionist.com/clients If you’re listening to this in February, and if you’re listening to this after
the training has already happened, don’t stress because you can get on demand access to the
full clients week training inside the paid program the profitable nutritionist as soon as you join,
A
like I said a few times a year I teach a big training like clients week, and afterwards, the
recordings are taken down and are only available inside the program. The reason for that is
that I don’t teach fluff, I absolutely hate that. So when you come to a free training or a class of
any kind that I am teaching, I’m going to go deep on the exact strategies and tools that I teach
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And I personally, I think that it’s important to make sure that it’s not just an overview, okay, it’s
not a thinly veiled sales pitch, I teach actual content from inside the program. And that is going
to make you actual money in this case. So you get a taste of what the program is like, then if
you want more of that you joined the program, and you get bigger results even faster, of
course, which brings me to the second reminder, it’s a great segue actually, which is to get
notified about resources like the free clients, we training and all of the other free stuff that we
have coming out this year, which I’m so excited to talk to you all about. Over the next couple of
months, we have a lot of new stuff brewing behind the scenes and a lot of things that you’re
going to see coming your way. Anyway, to get notified for all of that you have to be getting
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So although I’ve been having fun connecting over on LinkedIn recently, that’s been a new
endeavor of mine. I don’t post on any other social media right now, that could change at some
point later this year. But it won’t be me posting anyway. So I guess I can confidently say, No, I
won’t be posting on other social media. You’ll never see me doing rails on Instagram, because I
deactivated my account a long time ago. And for me, it’s just emails. So I’m racking my brain
right now, as I record this, no, that is true. I really won’t be even if we are on Instagram as the
profitable nutritionist at some point later this year. And I do have some announcements about
that. That could be coming later on. I guess I’m showing my hand. It won’t be me on there
boasting so anyway, all of my brainpower goes into emails, you have to be getting the emails.
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also always have the information that you need about upcoming enrollments in the program,
live trainings, all of the things so sign up for emails at the profitable nutritionists.com/clients.
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the profitable nutritionist.com homepage. Are any of the links where you have to enter your
email address, confirm your subscription, and then you’ll be getting all of the emails and
updates. Okay, so let’s get into success entitlement, or what you might think of as results,
entitlement, or expectations or results in patience and patience, maybe it would be another
way that we could title this episode for you and for your clients. There are three fixes for
overcoming success entitlement, or for crawling out of a hole when you’re not getting the
results that you want, so that you can get back on track. And then you have these tools to help
your clients do the same thing when it happens to them, because it will, at some point, they’re
going to think that their success should happen faster, they’re going to be impatient, they are
going to plateau, they are going to be in a hole and think it’s not working, and you’re gonna
have to help them get out of the hole. So first, we have to know how you could do it for you. What’s actually happening in your brain when it happens for you? And how do you help your
clients do it? Here’s the framework, it’s three fixes. And I’m gonna go into detail about each one
of these. Number one is understanding your expectations, or your perceptions are not
necessarily reality. So expectations versus reality, we’re going to talk all about that what’s
going on in your brain, and why we even have success entitlement in the first place. Number
two, you focus on you, not on them. And then number three, you focus on them not on you.
Yes, you did hear that correctly. And I meant it, it doesn’t make any sense. But it will make all
of the sense. And I’m going to get really real with you in this episode. And I want to be totally
honest, I have been in it with this topic of success entitlement over the last six months in it. I
have been in a hole. I’ve been in a hole several times in my business, but it really has felt like a
hole for the last six months, we’re on the other side of it. Now, maybe I should say it did feel
like that for the last six months of 2023, which I’ve talked a lot about. But yeah, this happens.
This happens at each stage of business. And I could see it in myself, I could see what was
happening in my brain. I’ve seen it in my clients, I know you’ll see it in years. So we have to talk
about it. When I say success, entitlement or results entitlement or impatience or whatever. I
mean, specifically, the difference between what your expectations are and the reality, plain and
simple. Like I said, I have been in it. Recently I have I’ve been wallowing in the pit. So I
understand. And I’ve also developed a framework to check myself and pull back out of it, which
is what I’m sharing today, I really didn’t want to get into the How to on this on coaching
yourself out of a hole or coaching yourself on success entitlement until I feel like I was really on
the other side of it. And I do feel like I am. But when you’re in it, it can be it can be quite a
thing. So I just wanted to say I feel you if you are in it, if you feel like you’re in a hole, your
business isn’t going the way that you want it to, you’re not getting the results in the timeframe
that you expected. And it’s frustrating, I get it, I totally get it. But the goal here is that you
taking yourself out of the hole, reframing all of it, understanding your expectations, and then
what the reality is, and that the chasm between really is just in your mind. And that’s the only
place that is going to allow you to help your clients do the same thing, you’re going to be a
master at this. And you are going to help your clients get results so much faster, and so much
simpler, because you will understand this for you and for them. So it’s all good we the teacher
becomes the student and all that, here we go. Five ways that our brain really freaks out in
terms of our reality not matching, what our expectations were going to be, are as follows how
long it will take, how much effort will be required, how much failure will happen along the way,
and how that will feel how past success does not guarantee future success. We’re gonna talk
about that. And then how other businesses or other people got to where they are, these are the
five ways that our brain will really create drama for us around our expectations, and then the
reality of the situation. So this is where we feel entitled to get certain amount of success, or a
certain level of success or a certain speed of success, all different variations of that in a certain
amount of time. Obviously, this really will come up but it can be more gradual to we’re gonna
talk about different variations. But basically your brain freaks out saying it should happen
faster, it should happen easier. It should not feel like failure, I should feel like it’s all good all the
time. And if not, I’m doing something wrong. I’ve done really well in the past. And so that
means I should do really well at this perfectionist, high achievers, hello, hello, anyone or other
people are so much further along, it’s easier for them, or they had more opportunities or
they’re just better at it or fill in the blank. Okay, this is how your brain will rationalize your
expectations not meeting reality. I have seen this play out for me, like really, really a lot in the
last six months of 2023. I did an entire podcast episode on that and I’ve actually talked a lot
about it since then. So you can go back to Episode 108 evaluating and troubleshooting a failed
launch to hear all about that. But really what We had a significant amount of tech issues in the
last part of 2023, which contributed to two if not one, or two and a half fish, really unsuccessful
launches that didn’t come anywhere near what was projected to bring in for those lunches the
number of students and amount of revenue. So I didn’t meet my revenue goal for last year. And
I had a lot of frustration around that I felt entitled to that success. Because I was assuming that
past success, guaranteed future success on some level, I recall several instances in fall of 2023,
saying things like, It’s just math, it’s just math. And even before that, like it’s just math, meaning we did X amount of sales last quarter, or we did X amount of sales last launch, it’s just
math that this is going to be this amount or more like it’s just math. Guess what, sometimes the
math doesn’t work that way, in business. Sometimes the math doesn’t work that way in health
and life. And that’s just the way it is. So we can do what I did for a little while at least is freak
out. Or we can monitor and adjust. Same with your clients, okay, they can completely freak out
when they hit a plateau in their health goals. Or you can set the expectations up front for them.
That what works for a while might not work forever, and it’s okay, nothing has gone wrong. But
you’re here you’re going to monitor and adjust together, that’s part of the process, reassuring
them that their expectations of that graph is going to be perfectly linear and always going up or
always going down. Well, that’s not really reality, right? The problem here is thinking that
something has gone wrong, when the expectations don’t meet the reality. Not true. The reality
is just a data point to evaluate and to learn from, it’s not an indication that everything is going
wrong, that you should start over that you should quit insert whatever thing your brain is
screaming at, you hear because your human brain will do that. Everything’s catastrophic. We
know, we know we know. But that is success entitlement. In a nutshell, it’s assuming that we’re
entitled to a certain amount of success in a certain amount of time, at a certain level of
exertion. At the same rate that someone else did. What now though, oh, it doesn’t work that
way. It doesn’t work that way at any level. And I just can eat my own humble pie here over in
the corner and realize that I was in it with this, and reminded of this, and I haven’t had a few
years of really steady growth, really predictable growth. And I got a dose of reality in 2023,
that, hey, our tech broke, we made some decisions that weren’t so great in migrating some
software’s, and that caused a setback in a lot of areas where I was spending my time where my
team was spending my time where our clients weren’t hearing from us where our launches
weren’t landing because nobody was getting emails, it’s all of the things we learned a lot. And it
just was a reminder that success entitlement Israel. Just because we’ve had past success
doesn’t mean we’re entitled to continue to get this success, we got to be iterating, we have to
be taking in the data and interpreting it, evaluating it, learning from it, and being comfortable
with the fact that sometimes it doesn’t work, nothing has gone wrong. We just have to pivot a
little bit. We just have to iterate. It’s okay. Ultimately, we need to expect that there’s going to
be a learning curve for anything new that we do, especially in business. Like I said, last year
was a huge reminder for me to New Level new devil, that’s okay. I should expect that it isn’t
going to work. Sometimes I should expect that when things are going really well for a while that
there’s going to be something that’s a curveball that’s coming in, I welcome it. I’m feeling really
refreshed this year with being on the other side of this hole and having crawled out of it.
Feeling like alright, I have a plan for what happens when my expectations and the reality are
not matching, and nothing has gone wrong. It’s okay, I can handle it. In fact, I welcome the
challenge. It’s all good. So I’ll let that marinate for a minute. The reality of being the boss of
owning your own company, of working with clients and being in charge of them and delivering
a process to them and guiding them. And growing your practice and learning all about how you
show up as an entrepreneur and what your tendencies are in your time management and all
just all of the things that we learn when we are in business for ourselves. The reality of that
circumstance is that it’s not going to be comfortable a majority of the time. That’s the reality. In
fact, it feels like crap a lot. Like you’re blindfolded and someone’s expecting you to go do
something for the first time. Nobody tells you this, especially business coaches. It’s kind of like
there’s an unspoken agreement in the business universe that if you just do things, right, it isn’t
really that hard. You won’t struggle. That’s a lie. It’s unspoken. I will say it’s unspoken, but ask
any successful or unsuccessful business owner for that matter. And they’re going to tell you
that there’s always struggle, but it is worth it. But that struggle doesn’t feel great a lot of the
time. Now what I teach is that business is simple. And it is but that’s not the same as easy or
comfortable. It’s really not simple. Yes, total The comfy and steady with no roller coaster of
mental drama No, no, nothing that’s worth it is like that no goal that you get to that you really
want is easy. Oh, it’s not comfortable. It’s just not our brains don’t approach new situations and
growth, and increasing the capacity for discomfort and everything that we have to do there
without emotions that suck. Sometimes it’s just part of the deal for you in your business and for
your clients in their health journey. So that’s where we go back to the original phase of talked
about, which is like, Is there even a problem? Is it a problem? If it’s not working? Is it a problem,
if this is taking longer than I thought isn’t a problem if I kind of suck at this, and usually I’m
good at things. And that makes me uncomfortable. Some of my clients in the DPN program, I’ve
shared this before that like man, I just killed it in other jobs in climbing the corporate ladder,
and everywhere else I show up, I kill it. And this growing a business is a new skill set that I have
been humbled with. It’s like, yes, that’s so cool. Because who doesn’t want the challenge, right.
And ultimately, we do we want the challenge, we just also want the certainty of knowing, and
it’s going to be worth it in the long run, and it’s going to work out. And someday I’ll look back on
this and be glad that I did it. So just know that you can have that certainty. As long as you don’t
quit, you can have that. All right. It’s uncomfortable. Sometimes it’s hard, you have to figure
out how to get to work even when your brain is giving you all the reasons to do anything but
get to work. But when it doesn’t feel good, that’s really not even a problem. It’s just part of
being a business owner, I would say that that’s where we bump up against expectations versus
reality, we have this feeling of like, we’re entitled to just feel good all the time and always see
the A on the report card. But the reality is, doesn’t always feel good. You’re not always going to
be in alignment, you’re not always going to feel like it’s just flowing, you’re not going to know
exactly what to say and what to do all the times. That’s okay. It might not always be your best
month ever. Maybe you don’t always grow. Maybe you go backwards. Sometimes that’s just
part of it. That’s some of the reality. All right, you will doubt yourself. Sometimes you just want
to crawl under the covers, sometimes it isn’t working. Yeah. Sometimes you’re just really
uncomfortable. Yeah, that’s the reality. Okay, but here’s what else is reality. It’s not all doom
and gloom. Your business doesn’t have to make you feel good all the time. That’s not the job of
your business. The purpose of your business is to help people to solve the problems that
they’re struggling with. And to provide financial freedom and flexibility to you. You don’t have
to feel great all the time for those two things to happen. Fact, you’re gonna feel way better
when you expect that you’re not always going to feel great while you’re doing those things.
That it’s not a panic situation when it happens. And here’s another reality bomb, before we
move on, is that your business is a puzzle. It’s a really cool puzzle. By the way, it has lots of
pieces, and you can’t just sit down and work on it and finish the puzzle. It’s ongoing, the more
pieces get added. Just when you think you’re almost done with the puzzle, more pieces get
dropped down that you have to figure out. And also your puzzle looks way different than
anybody else’s. And you don’t have a box, like the cover the box cover that lid to look at to see
what it’s supposed to look like at the end, you don’t really have that you don’t know what
you’re building, you’re just putting one piece together at a time and figuring it out as you go.
And that’s just what your business is like. So don’t have the expectation that there’s a time
when the puzzle is complete, and you’re done. Because the reality is, that’s not possible. And
you wouldn’t even want it to be needed something to work at, and improve at and strive for.
That’s kind of the human experience, really. So embrace the uncertainty and the possibility in
your business and then let it push you right, let it be hard sometimes let it be uncomfortable.
That just feels better expect for it to kind of feel like a hot mess. When you do things you’ve
never done before. Like if you’ve never done consults before, when you jump on a console and
you sell somebody that you’ve never talked to a stranger, you’ve never done it before, it’s
going to be uncomfortable, you’re not going to really know what you’re doing, because you’ve
never done it before. Of course you don’t. But you have to figure out how to do better it figure
out how to improve it to figure out how to be really good at sales. You can expect for other
people in your life to be less than supportive of your new priorities. If previously, you’ve just
taken care of them. And all of a sudden, your time is spent somewhere else. And maybe they’re
not really excited about that you could expect it nothing has gone wrong. It’s part of it.
Everybody’s learning boundaries change, right? This is all part of it. So all that to say, let’s not
be entitled or feel entitled for everything to be easy. And for it to go at exactly the pace that we
think that it could or should. Let’s just not do that to ourselves. It’s really, really not fun. And
when you do that you’ll be subtly expecting the same with your clients. You’ll be kind of
modeling to your clients that things should go at a certain rate that there should never be
setbacks, that it should be uncomfortable that everyone in their life should support everything
that they’re doing that they’ll never have to enforce any boundaries. They’ll never have to set
any right all of those things that could come up for You and your business are also going to
come up for your clients. So the more aware that you are that nothing has gone wrong, when
there are some new skills to learn, and there are some feelings that don’t feel so great. On a
day to day basis, it’s okay, nothing has gone wrong, it’s still worth it, it’s still worth it to make
the progress, it’s still worth it to consistently show up and do the things that you said you were
going to do. With over 100 episodes of the profitable nutritionist podcast at this point, my team
asked if we could create a podcast and roadmap quick guide to the most popular episodes,
which I thought was a fabulous idea. They’re so smart, we ended up categorizing thirtyish of
the top episodes into a few different lists and categories. So you can easily find the most useful
content for exactly where you’re at in your business right now. To get the podcast roadmap
download, just go to the profitable nutritionist.com/roadmap One word, you’re more than
welcome to binge all of the episodes, of course. But if you’d like the shortcut guide, this
roadmap is going to be gold for navigating to the exact episodes that you need right now.
Again, download the PDF at the profitable nutritionist.com/roadmap. Another thing here is
people are expecting that they’re going to be at the same level of success as their colleagues
or for your clients. This shows up as them expecting that they’re going to be at the same level
of success or same rate of success as someone else that they know that’s on a similar journey
than they are. The reality is that everyone’s at a different point in their business, in their
health, whatever it is, everyone’s starting at a different stage. Everyone’s on a different path.
Everyone comes to the table with different skills, a different body, different, you know, for your
clients, it’s there by individuals, they have different conditions, they have different levels of
fitness, all sorts of things. In your business, you have different skill sets, you have different
experiences as well, you might already be really good at sales, you might not be someone else
might be really good already at marketing, you might not be able to who knows everyone’s
fighting their own battles, though. So it does no good to be feeling entitled to the same level or
rate of success as somebody else, not for you, not for your clients. None of that is good. I have
had many conversations with my high earning students in the mastermind about this, that are
making six or multiple six figures a year, even when they’re stressed about that, because
they’re comparing to me, they’re comparing to my business, but that’s apples oranges,
because I have a bigger team than they do. So it’s a different conversation, I’m coming to the
table with a different scenario. So this is also something to look at if you really feeling this
compare and despair about other businesses or other practitioners or whatever that is for you.
Remember that when people including me say that they’re working 20 hours or less a week,
that doesn’t mean that their business is working 20 hours or less a week. Because this and like
I said, this is a conversation we have in the mastermind a lot where it’s we I just have to check,
you know, are we comparing apples to apples, because in my business, the business is working
100 plus hours a week, because I have a team working, there’s many people’s hours that are
contributing to what we’re cranking out on a weekly basis. Now, it’s not just me. So the time
that I’m spending is not the time that the business is spending. Now there isn’t a right model or
a wrong model or anything like that, it’s just important to understand that there’s a lot going
on, in everybody’s business success a lot contributing to it, it does no good to have any
entitlement to have the same level of success, especially if you maybe don’t even understand
what’s going on behind the scenes. Just it doesn’t you know, good, not helpful at all. But also
kind of useful to just think about sometime in the future, maybe the near future maybe way in
the future when you aren’t doing all the things because you want your business to be
structured in your dream way. Maybe you’re similar to me, and you do want to be working part
time, but have your business very, very full time, it means that you or someone is going to be
doing the other things, right. So software, people, all the things that are at play here to be
doing things that maybe you’re doing now, but you won’t be doing forever, hey, that’s a factor.
It’s all happening. Just because I’m not posting on social media to market my business doesn’t
mean I’m not marketing elsewhere. For example, in the future, when and if we do get back on
social media as a company, doesn’t mean that I’m on social media actually won’t be on social
media. So anyway, just something to think about. If you have any success entitlement in
regards to comparing yourself to other colleagues that you know, just think about that or any
other businesses that you’re comparing to, is it apples to apples, or is it apples to oranges,
because really, they have a team they have other software’s they have other other assets. I
don’t know something to think about. Now, to finish up this point on expectations versus reality
before we move into our second fix for success, entitlement want to talk about value, because
value has to be exchanged and created for your business to get results. I’m gonna say that
again. I don’t want to gloss over this value has to be exchanged and created for your business
to get the results. You’re not going to get out of sales. For example, someone has got to do it. If
that’s value, okay, same with everything else in your business. So I want you to have your
dream business model, I want you to have everything that you want your business, but just
know that someone or something has to be doing these things in creating the value, like there
has to be marketing, whether it’s clients that are marketing on your behalf, because they’re
getting such great results. And so they are your referral engines, someone is doing the
marketing, do you see what I’m saying, if you have a website that is really well thought out and
put together and is working behind the scenes to convert casual web traffic into leads that then
become clients of yours, that is marketing that is happening something or someone has to be
doing it. So just keep this in mind. All right, the success entitlement can really creep up when
we feel like we shouldn’t have to be doing things other businesses don’t do this. I think some
people think that because I grew my business to seven figures a year without social media that
I don’t mark it, like what I do, I’m doing other marketing, and people, other people are
marketing on my behalf. And I’m also doing other things. So just think about that. I guess what I
want to say here is like you don’t get out of things like marketing, sales, fulfilling to your
clients, having a great client experience, the admin stuff on the back end accounting, paying
taxes, figuring out where all the money’s going, it doesn’t necessarily have to be you doing
this, but someone has to do it, or something has to do it. I just see this, a lot of times with
people feeling like I shouldn’t have to worry about it. And I think that that’s a version of success
entitlement to it’s like, oh, I should be able to be successful without ever having to do anything
with tech, when maybe you don’t want to, in your business be in charge of tech stuff, but
somebody can, or something can. And then still you can have a business that has some
automations and things in place. Tech wise, I don’t know something to think about. Ultimately,
our businesses can be joyful, they can be simple, they can even be really uncomplicated. We
don’t need to grind, grind, grind, and hustle, hustle, hustle and worked on till dusk in the name
of success, we can let it be simple. But there has to be a value exchange, okay, value created
from you, in the beginning your company as it gets bigger to your clients, right? Think about
the value. And we’re going to come back to that in a second. But think about that. For me in the
last year, I’m going to be completely honest with you that I wanted my past successes to
guarantee a certain amount of growth within a certain amount of time, that just wasn’t the
reality. I’ve said that a couple times already, I felt entitled to getting the results I wanted. It
slapped me in the face when it didn’t work that way. But luckily, value and value creation was
still very, very top of mind. So my business is okay, like everything is going to be okay, it’s fine.
And we’re really building on everything that we learned last year, and I think going to really
skyrocket this year. Of course, I’m not entitled to that success. It’s not just math, I won’t, I won’t
say that again. But I really do feel confident that what I learned last year is going to result in a
lot of growth, because we are creating even more value. And the value for from me and as a
company from my team to you is always at the forefront of our minds. So that is one thing that
I know we do really well. And I want to offer that for you. Okay, so the second to fix fix number
two is take radical responsibility, when you’re feeling this success entitlement. Or if your clients
are, it’s important to take radical responsibility. If there isn’t a value exchange going on, be
honest with yourself about it take responsibility for that, if things have slowed down in your
business, or if things have slowed down for your clients in their health, or they aren’t, they just
aren’t wrapping up as fast as you thought that they would whichever version of that. And if you
can see you’ve been in success entitlement and you’re like, ah, you know, I could kind of feel
like I think that things should be different than they are. That’s really what this is. It’s
impatience, it’s feeling entitled to the results. Like it shouldn’t be different, I should have better
results by now I’ve been working so hard, it should be at this. All right, if that’s what you’re in,
you have to take responsibility for it like in a really radical weigh. In a huge extreme. It’s only
because of you kind of way and your clients need to do the same thing. Take 100%
responsibility. digging yourself out of any hole requires making every single thing about you
not external factors that you can’t control. Not at all, it’s all about you. Like you have to
reframe every single situation into how did you create it? And how are you solely responsible
for that thing happening? Which your brain is gonna want to argue with a lot. It’s gonna want to
say I couldn’t control it. These are external circumstances. This was because of someone else it
was because of this sort of none at all. We have to realize that we are in control of some part of
the situation. If it’s not obvious how we’re totally to blame for the entire thing, then we have to
be able to at least take radical responsibility for part of it and figure out where am I responsible
for this happening? This is really tricky. I’m going to be honest, it’s hard. Your brain does not
want to do this. Your brain wants to make everything someone else’s problem or something
else’s problem, like external stuff that you can’t control. That’s the reason That’s the reason
we’re not getting the success that we wanted. That’s the reason it’s not going as fast. That’s
the reason it’s not as good as someone else’s results. Data Data. Not true, though. So you have
to figure out what can you control in the context of any external circumstances that your brain
wants to blame? What can you control there? And what part of that actually is your fault? Or
can you take responsibility for it? If seeing your fault really doesn’t feel good to you? Like, to
me, that doesn’t bother me. But I could see some people saying, I don’t want to say
something’s my fault. Okay, how am I in control of this? And how is it my responsibility to fix it?
Okay, figure out how that is true. Don’t blame the economy, you can’t actually control the
economy. But how does your offer that you can control actually make more or less sense in the
current economy? Because that you can control? How have you not been conveying the value
that your offer provides? Going back to value again, how have you not been messaging that?
How have you not been explaining that? What do you need to change? What do you need to
say that’s different, you are in control of that. So when people tell me the economy has shifted,
great, that may or may not be true, we could spend a lot of time talking about that. Or since
that would be a huge waste of time, we could get to work on what we can control in the current
economy, our messaging, our offer, who we’re talking to, are we addressing people’s concerns
about the economy, as we’re selling and marketing our offer, that’s something you are in
control of, you see where I’m going here, figure out where you are in control, figure out how
you can take 100% responsibility of everything that’s not going well, or everything that could
be contributing to where you’re not seeing the success that you feel entitled to such hard work,
but it is so worth it. You don’t have the wrong audience. It’s not the wrong timing for them. It’s
not the wrong timing for you to be working with. It’s nothing like that. Figure out what is true in
this situation, what can you control? How are you not showing up the way that you plan to?
How could you actually tweak something in your business, or in your schedule, or in your
messaging, like what what tweaks need to happen not Oh, my gosh, it’s just the wrong people.
It just people don’t want to buy, people don’t understand. People want to take a magic pill, they
don’t want to do the hard work. I hear these things a lot, I’m going to tell you, there is some
nugget here where you can take 100% responsibility, and that is fixed. Number two, when
you’re in success, entitlement, you need to get out of it by taking radical responsibility. And of
course, the same thing goes for your clients. I’ve said this, but I need to repeat it. When they
have results, entitlement and things aren’t working the way that they want it to. They need to
take radical responsibility for all of it. And you need to help them do that. Okay, you need to
make it about what they can control, not what they can’t, our brains as humans need to know
what we can control or else we’re going to spiral into overwhelm, and have anxiety and be in a
territory where everything is happening to us. No, no, that’s not helpful. Your job is to help your
clients figure out what they can control and start there. So fixed number two, is to make it all
about you taking radical responsibility for all of it, all of it. And then fix number three is
realizing that it actually has nothing to do with you. It’s all about them. Ah, I know, I know, take
a moment make that make sense, if I just broke your brain. Fix number two, make it all about
you take radical responsibility fixed. Number three is it is actually nothing to do with you. What
I mean by that is, although you have 100% responsibility for your actions and your results,
never make those results mean anything about you as a person, you are not your results. So
when I say radical responsibility, I mean take responsibility for your actions. But you aren’t your
actions take responsibility for the results you’ve gotten thus far. And the fact that you can
control changing them. But don’t make those results mean anything about you. Okay, you are
not worthy or unworthy based on the results that your clients get, or that your business gets or
how fast your business takes off. None of that is you, as a person, as a human, you are whole
and you are worthy right now, as is. And so are your clients. So to quickly get yourself out of
success, entitlement and feeling like you’re in a hole, all you need to do is one thing, so simple.
Here’s how you do it. You focus on them, not on you value for them, we’re gonna close this loop
on getting back to the value. Think about your people think about the value you are creating
for them and why it is so important that you are here and you are doing this work, and that
they know you they’re in your orbit in some way or they’re coming into your orbit in some way.
You’re preparing for them, whatever it is, how are your people suffering? How do they need to
hear from you today? How are they confused? And how can you clarify the next best step for
them? Maybe you just need to connect some dots. How can you create that value? How are the
results that they get when they work with you changing their entire lives, or their entire
families and generations to come? That’s what I mean by making it about them thinking about
them obsessing about them you show Pulling up and getting success in service of them.
Getting success is the name of the game, right? Of course it is. So remind your brain of that
over and over again, especially when you’re in feelings of success, entitlement. This is how you
turn things around, and you get out of it. Or if you’re spiraling in a dry spell in your business,
you just you’re feeling like you’re in a hole, I can say that this was a game changer for me, the
last half of 2023, when our launches were failing, and the tech wasn’t working, and the emails
weren’t getting delivered, even though the email service providers said that they were said
that everything was fine. It was not true. And nothing was going according to plan whatsoever,
I kept reminding myself of how valuable it was going to be for you, for me to go through that,
and to teach on it afterwards, so that you didn’t have to make the same mistakes in my daily
self coaching. I can look back and I did before I did this episode, I looked at what, what what I
was coaching myself on, and what did that look like all through the fall. And I can see that
theme over and over again, is me reminding myself that feeling entitled to a certain amount of
growth or accomplishing milestones in a given timeframe, and hitting the goals and all of that
that is going to be something that you come up against to when it doesn’t work. And I was just
going first it’s going to happen to you, it’s going to happen to your clients. But it’s actually
better that I was going through it first so that I could teach on it. And so I could do an episode
like this. And I am so glad that I could keep that in mind when I was in the thick of it. And I
encourage you to do the same thing. For me, at least, I think it’s actually better to eat some
humble pie like this, and talk about it and talk about what it feels like to assume that you’re
going to get there to whatever there is whatever the result is in a certain amount of time,
however fast that is, and get the goals and check the boxes like yeah, let’s talk about what
happens when that doesn’t work, when it doesn’t happen. And when you’re not crashing,
because we want to only talk about how we feel and what’s working when we’re crashing. You
probably feel like that with your clients, do you want to give them the highlight reel, and maybe
not the messy stuff. But that’s not the reality a lot of the time. And that’s okay, it isn’t supposed
to be. So lastly, I just want to remind you to build all of this into your process with your clients,
truly coach them and teach them on the expectations versus reality. What does it look like?
Maybe even make a list of the expectations that your clients have about the process of working
with you? Like what do they actually expect? And getting results in their health? What are their
expectations there? Make a list? What do they expect it to be like? How do they expect to feel
while it’s happening? What do they expect to think? How do they expect others in their life to
behave towards them? That’s a really fun one, get really detailed, how long do they expect it to
take? From their point of view? What are their expectations? And then go through each of those
expectations and write out what the reality is? How does it actually work? How do they actually
feel? Maybe it’s the same maybe it’s not, I don’t know, let’s get curious. Maybe it’s even better
than they expect it’s going to be, that’s entirely possible. But when you see this in black and
white, you’re going to be able to talk about those results in a new way that excites them about
the possibilities that are available. And also normalizes the reality, which is it might not be
exciting all the time. And that nothing has gone wrong, it’s okay, it’s not a problem. This is
going to put your mind at rest and calm you down about any anxiety you have in thinking that
your clients are going to be upset or disappointed in you if it gets hard. Let’s just set that
expectation upfront. When it’s needing to get set. Let’s go through where did Where are their
expectations? Where’s the reality? Where might there be a disconnect there? And how can you
prep them for that and normalize it, that’s really what needs to happen, hear success,
entitlements gonna show up for you and your business. I’m sure at some point, it’s going to
show up for your clients at some point as well. But we have a process for getting back to the
basics and overcoming. So there you have it, my friend, the three fixes for overcoming success,
entitlement or crawling out of a hole when you’re not getting the results that you want. So you
can get back on track is understanding your expectations, or your perceptions of reality or not
necessarily reality, right? expectations versus reality, understanding that there’s a difference
between the two. Number two, focus on you, not them taking 100% responsibility for what you
can control. And then lastly, focus on them, not you because actually it is all about them. How
do you obsess about their results and creating value for them and make it about them and not
about you. And then of course make it about their results. And not you as a person if they’re
not getting the results. So there’s so many such a tangled web in there of all of the things we
can make it mean when we are our people are not getting results. So we got to get clear on
that. We got to sort it out a little bit. Hopefully this episode was helpful for you to think through
that for yourself. And remember, if you’re listening to this in real time, you absolutely need to
register for my free clients week training. It starts February 26 so that you can sign your next
10 perfect clients in 60 days or less, probably much less. You register right now at the
profitable nutritionist.com slash clients. And like I said earlier, if you’re listening after the live
training date of February 26, make sure that you’re getting the profitable nutritionist emails. So
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you can also sign up on the show notes for this episode, by the way, and remember that there
are links on the show notes page for any episodes that I mentioned here. Any other resources
as well as always Alright my friend. Have a wonderful week.